Thursday, January 19, 2006

The Ex - The Question

Mr Magaidi ("KT"-now I am told):

What to do about Ex's? This question dogs relationships the world around. I have a particularly (and uncharacteristically) tight relationship with my ex, which initially was a problem for baby girl. I don't blame her and never did even back then. On my trip back to Kenya a few years back, she was all nerves wondering what would happen between us (my ex and I) since our break up had been mutual. I tell you this because I frankly didn't know - I knew what I wasn't going to do though.

We've moved on since. I spoke to her this past December. She hooked up with some other dude and they've been together for some years, the guy is now in Seattle, WA and they're still together. My situation is a unique one. A friend visiting from that area told me the dude has another chic here. My Ex sms'd me, she has no idea and asked me whether if I knew I'd tell her: What to do?

10 Comments:

At 2:27 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I hate being in that position. I say yes yes yes, please do tell her. But only if you can confirm it to be true. Yes.

 
At 7:15 AM, Anonymous Mocha said...

tell her. afterall, your ex is still your friend, which is a rare thing. lakini confirm if the details are true first.

it aint the best situation to find yourself in, but you have to do what you know is right.

all the best!

 
At 9:55 AM, Blogger Stunuh Jay said...

Give her the new chicks number...OK that's cold and low...You could always just resort to telling her.
'Look a buddy of mine once said that he has a girlfreind. But I don't know, and as I haven't seen with my own eyes I can't confirm or deny. So if I see anything, I'll let you know'
And then proceed to avoid the two timing cheating lower than pond scum (OK... so I don't like the guy from the FACTS (?) given!) SO that way you don't hurt her feelings, but you've told her what's been said. Without pitching in your hat.

 
At 11:52 AM, Blogger akiey said...

That's a tricky, murky situation right there. It may be the right thing to tell her but there's also a possibility of her needing to lean on you thru the rough times she'll go through. Fast forward & your current girlfriend may feel uncertain of your closeness to the ex. A catch 22 of sorts.

 
At 1:23 PM, Blogger Whispering Inn said...

You my friend are in an unenviable position! Tell her ONLY if she asks directly aaaaand ONLY if you can confirm the guys dirt. Buuuut, you have to ask yourself, how long did they seriously expect to stay together, separated by 10,000 miles? If the chick is not joining ol' boy and ol'boy has no plans of returning soon, they are gonna break up ANYWAY! So it's just a matter of delaying the inevitable - an excercise in futility. Besides, a guy gets backed up, you know, LOL!

 
At 10:46 PM, Blogger KenyanMusings said...

Tell her. If you are 100% sure tell her. It is only fair to watch put for a friend...and she is your friend isn't she?
Could you ever stop blaming yourself if something crazy happened like she caught some deadly disease huh? If you could have helped?
Do tell. It will hurts, but go on and tell.

 
At 6:49 PM, Blogger Mignon said...

before you tell her, only to find out it was a rumor, u have to be 100% sure that it's true. then, you do what any good friend should; tell her. make sure your chick is in on the developments too, u don't wanna be accused of anything either!

 
At 4:25 AM, Blogger Prousette said...

Verify your story 100% then spill the beans. All of them.

 
At 10:23 PM, Anonymous m said...

Tell her!!!

If you don't and she finds out you knew ....

 
At 3:43 AM, Blogger dangerously_shy said...

Oh child, I was u, I would mind my own business, this is a classic case of “he said-she said” vile u don’t have any proof..so really u have a snowballs chance in hell of convincing her that her boyfriend is up to no good..

Yes yes, i know u r “tight” but I see the messenger getting shot in this case..and besides, whose to say she doesn’t already know and has chosen to ignore the situation, lets face it, women abroad put up with a lot more than they would if they were in Kenya…my two cents..

 

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